If a girl gives you her number, does that mean she likes you?

I feel like you guys can help me with this, since most of you on here are way older and have far more experience with this than I do.

Ok so there is this girl who is in my college class and I recently got her phone number like 2 days ago. But before I tell you about how I got her number, I think I need to give you some background information, this might be long but I feel like I need to be very specific. The first time I met her was about 5 months ago during the 1st week of class, well it wasn't really me meeting her, I kind of just saw her for the first time during our writing exercise. As I was saying my piece she was looking at me with her bright smile. At first I didn't really pay much attention to her because there was another girl I was more focused on at the time but I lost interest in her for various reasons. Around the beginning of October is when I really started to notice her though. We were assigned to the same group to discuss our papers and she seemed interested to hear my story and I remember before I started reading she was smiling at me and maintained eye contact. I mean she was always attractive but for some reason her beauty just radiated that day. BTW, our class only meets like once a week so that might be important. Anyways, the next week our class met, she was looking even more amazing and for our exercises she seemed to always be near me and even sat next to me once while there were like a million other seats in the computer lab. Although I didn't talk to her until class ended and I walked and talked with her until we went outside and then I told her I would see her later. I didn't walk and talk with her like that for a while though.

The next week we got put in groups again and our professor gave us a bunch of notes to write down and I missed most of them. I asked her if I could copy some of her notes and she just gave me her whole thing. I asked if she was sure because the test was incoming and I didn't want her to have nothing to study from but she merely insisted. I gave her a photo copy of it for the next week. For a while nothing really happened and I even missed one class because I had to go out of town for thanksgiving. But I was feeling pretty disheartened because she started showing less interest in me for 3 consecutive weeks including the one week before Thanksgiving I missed. And there was this other dude she seemed to be more friendly with now after I got back. Since our class only meets one day a week, and the semester is coming to a close soon, I didn't really have much time left to get to know her better in class so I knew I had to somehow get into contact with her outside of class.

Two days ago was the last class I had and I was kind of unfocused because I kept thinking about what I did wrong because it seemed like she was avoiding me almost and she didn't look at me even once. Except around 5 minutes left of class she caught me staring at her and I looked away quickly. Once class ended she was the first one out and I walked a little faster cause I thought I would have to catch up with her but amazingly, she waited for me. She stood there and literally held the door for me and started talking with me as we started walking together. It was a slightly awkward conversation, but not in the sense that she seemed uninterested. She seemed like she was trying to be more talkative but she also seemed nervous for some weird reason. Still, it was a pretty decent conversation and I got to know a little bit more about her as a result. Last time I only walked with her outside and told her I'd see her later near the entrance, but this time I walked with her all the way to her car. She thanked me for walking with her and I told her I would add her on facebook but she said she didn't have one so I asked if she had a phone number (I know, that was a stupid question) but she said yes and I asked if I could have her phone number. She then laughed and said sure and told me her number. I admit I was very happy, but now I am a bit worried that even though she gave me her number it might not necessarily mean she likes me.

I texted her on that same day but I did it at around 9;00. I said "Hey it's me!" and she said who's me? I told her it was the guy that walked with her and she said oh haha and told me she just got off of work and asked what I was up to. We talked for a little but not for too long and she didn't respond super fast, but to be fair I took a while to respond back too. She asked me what my story in class was about and then I told her about it in like a huge paragraph. I asked her what her's was about but she didn't respond back, I think it might have been because I took so long to write that paragraph. Conversation started at 9:09 and ended at 9:59 btw. I decided not to text her again until today so I didn't come off as needy. I texted her "Hey!" at around 3:44 today but she still hasn't respond back to the text five hours later. Is there a reason she hasn't texted me back yet? Did I screw up? I'm not really sure if she really likes me or not now and I was hoping someone could help me?
 

Johnstantine

Skibbidy Boo Bop
Not sure what to say other than to just wait it out and not text her back. The ball is in her court, so see what she does with it.

Also, not to be harsh, but most likely the reason she hasn't texted you back is because she sensed a lack of confidence, or she just has no interest in it.
 
Ok I am a bit lost here, what exactly did I do to make her sense my lack of confidence if that were the case? I thought it was kind of bold of me to walk with her to her car for example and actually ask her for her number. Unless I'm wrong somehow?
 
As SKnet's resident love doctor and host of the hit radio show SKnet Love Lines, I have three pieces of advice for you.

1. Tap the brakes a bit.

I understand that you're excited. But if you're so excited that you're time stamping conversations and becoming a bundle of nervous energy when she doesn't text you back immediately then you're at severe risk of smothering her. And if you smother her by texting or calling her constantly even when she hasn't responded all you'll end up doing is scaring her away. I have yet to meet a woman who thinks that desperation is attractive. I have yet to meet a woman who thinks that a man smothering her is attractive.

Keep in mind that a courtship is a marathon not a sprint. So sit back and let her breathe a little. She's not going anywhere. And neither are you. So what's the rush?


2. If you don't ask the answer's always no.

This one is pretty self explanatory. I'm not saying run up to her and ask her out the next time you see her. However, keep in mind that if you never ask her to hang out or go on a date or whatever then there's a one hundred percent chance you're not going to hang out or go on a date or whatever. (Obviously.) All you have to do is nonchalantly ask her to grab some coffee or something sometime. But remember....

3. Corporations Women are people, my friend.

Women aren't pieces of meat. Women aren't just tools for our pleasure. Women are human beings just like you and me. Women have thoughts and feelings too. I'm not saying anything we don't already know here. However, I bring it up because it's a simple fact that we sometimes forget. If you're only wanting to get laid then you're doing a disservice to her. Nobody likes to be seen as nothing more than a tool. So when you initially ask her out or on a date or whatever, do so with only the intent to get to know her a bit more as a person.

If you met another male you thought you could be friends with, you wouldn't only be thinking about getting into his pants, right? You'd be more interested in finding out what he's interested in, his thoughts, etc, right? Well, the reason why is because you see that other male as a person not an object or tool. So don't forget to do the same for women. :)

I hope these points help you out, my friend. Good luck!

And as always your mileage may vary.
 

Aazealh

Administrator
Staff member
Here's the truth of the world: a girl smiling at you doesn't mean she's sexually attracted to you. Giving you her number, talking to you, sitting next to you, none of these is a surefire thing. Also worth noting: if she's not into you, nothing will change that. But if she is, being desperate will turn her off, as it's been said.

Now, things are simple in life you know. Let a few days pass by. Maybe even a week. Then ask her quite simply and directly if she'd like to hang out, or to go grab a drink. Either she will or she won't. If she does, get to know her and so on, and if she doesn't, move on and find another chick you'd like to be with. Don't stay hung up on that one, it'd be fruitless.
 

Lithrael

Remember, always hold your apple tight
Also depends if she's a typical on the phone txting all the time type or not. Some girls are glued to their phones and not replying is usually deliberate. Other girls use it more for an actual point of contact when needed, conversations being a low priority, and not replying is usually not intentional.

Either way though yeah, though it's hard to take the 'relax and let things happen naturally, let her know you're interested but not by standing on her feet' type advice, it is generally good advice.

While I have run into a few fellow girls who do seem disdainful towards guys who don't try hard enough, I will frankly say I've never seen those particular girls with a guy who looked like he was enjoying a healthy relationship.
 
Deci said:
You are way over-thinking it. Is it possible for you to turn that off?

Honestly I don't think I can, I'm over analytical by nature and as such I tend to over think a lot of things in general.

Aazealh said:
Here's the truth of the world: a girl smiling at you doesn't mean she's sexually attracted to you. Giving you her number, talking to you, sitting next to you, none of these is a surefire thing. Also worth noting: if she's not into you, nothing will change that. But if she is, being desperate will turn her off, as it's been said.

Now, things are simple in life you know. Let a few days pass by. Maybe even a week. Then ask her quite simply and directly if she'd like to hang out, or to go grab a drink. Either she will or she won't. If she does, get to know her and so on, and if she doesn't, move on and find another chick you'd like to be with. Don't stay hung up on that one, it'd be fruitless.

Wow, so even if a girl gives you her number that still doesn't guarantee that she likes you? Damn, it seems like there is no way to tell if a girl likes you unless they tell you or you over hear them talk about you or something. Well okay, so what your saying is that I shouldn't text her for a while and when I see her again this coming Tuesday that I should ask her to hang out with me? Or would it be a better idea to not do anything until next Friday and I call her?

Walter said:
Only advice that's worth anything in the dating world: Project Confidence.

So am I projecting my confidence sufficiently or do I come off as being unsure of myself?

Skeleton said:
As SKnet's resident love doctor and host of the hit radio show SKnet Love Lines, I have three pieces of advice for you.

1. Tap the brakes a bit.

I understand that you're excited. But if you're so excited that you're time stamping conversations and becoming a bundle of nervous energy when she doesn't text you back immediately then you're at severe risk of smothering her. And if you smother her by texting or calling her constantly even when she hasn't responded all you'll end up doing is scaring her away. I have yet to meet a woman who thinks that desperation is attractive. I have yet to meet a woman who thinks that a man smothering her is attractive.

Keep in mind that a courtship is a marathon not a sprint. So sit back and let her breathe a little. She's not going anywhere. And neither are you. So what's the rush?


2. If you don't ask the answer's always no.

This one is pretty self explanatory. I'm not saying run up to her and ask her out the next time you see her. However, keep in mind that if you never ask her to hang out or go on a date or whatever then there's a one hundred percent chance you're not going to hang out or go on a date or whatever. (Obviously.) All you have to do is nonchalantly ask her to grab some coffee or something sometime. But remember....

3. Corporations Women are people, my friend.

Women aren't pieces of meat. Women aren't just tools for our pleasure. Women are human beings just like you and me. Women have thoughts and feelings too. I'm not saying anything we don't already know here. However, I bring it up because it's a simple fact that we sometimes forget. If you're only wanting to get laid then you're doing a disservice to her. Nobody likes to be seen as nothing more than a tool. So when you initially ask her out or on a date or whatever, do so with only the intent to get to know her a bit more as a person.

If you met another male you thought you could be friends with, you wouldn't only be thinking about getting into his pants, right? You'd be more interested in finding out what he's interested in, his thoughts, etc, right? Well, the reason why is because you see that other male as a person not an object or tool. So don't forget to do the same for women. :)

I hope these points help you out, my friend. Good luck!

And as always your mileage may vary.

1. I guess you're right about me being too excited, it's just that this is the farthest I've ever gotten with a girl I actually liked so I thought I was really getting somewhere with this. Back in high school I probably wouldn't have even attempted this since I had to deal with like 2 rejections from girls I really liked in the beginning of my high school career and 1 my senior year. I don't necessarily think it's my fault, but I always tend to like the wrong girls, and they are always the girls I don't get to see that often too who are uninterested in me. Also, I'm very impatient by nature, so it's very hard for me to take my time but I will try really hard to keep it cool.

2. Yeah I understand that for sure, I mean I knew that if I didn't get her number at some point soon then I would have no way of contacting her outside of class since I only see her once every week. Plus it's very hard to create conversations with her since she is kind of shy and I'm not really a good conversation starter myself. Still, I've had to be the one to start most of our conversations. But, her actually waiting to hold the door for me and walking and talking with me kind of really got my hopes up because it's just out of character for her. She isn't the type to initiate these type of things, in fact the day I got her number I was thinking of how I was going to speak with her in class (which didn't work out because of all the group activities) so I had to figure out a way to start a conversation with her outside of class soon and since she was the first one to leave I felt I had to hurry up cause she would have been near the stairs if I walked at my usual pace. But she actually waited for me, held the door, initiated conversation with me, and we walked together for a while. Also if I ask her to hang out, I'm not even going to be able to take her out cause I still only have my permit (LONG STORY) so if even if she said yes she would have to be the one to take us to a place. My brother drops me off to class and picks me up after. And also, I don't really like coffee and it seems like everybody takes someone out to coffee for the first time to get to know each other, can it be somewhere else like a fast food place?

3. I definitely understand this, I've never been the type of dude to look at a girl just for sex, all the girls I've liked I've genuinely been interested in learning more about them as a person. That's why most of the girls I was into I never really talked with my other friends about because they always talked about how they sexed up their girlfriends bragging about making her cum like 20 times and all that jazz, which I know is a bunch of bullshit. I think more romantically when it comes to girls I develop feelings for so when I think of being with them, we are hanging out in cool places, having interesting conversations, some arguments that could happen, and making love and cuddling with her all day. So I'm not thinking at all about fucking this girl's brains out, I want to learn more about her as a person. And I like hearing her talk, her voice is very relaxing for me to listen to.

Lithrael said:
Also depends if she's a typical on the phone txting all the time type or not. Some girls are glued to their phones and not replying is usually deliberate. Other girls use it more for an actual point of contact when needed, conversations being a low priority, and not replying is usually not intentional.

Either way though yeah, though it's hard to take the 'relax and let things happen naturally, let her know you're interested but not by standing on her feet' type advice, it is generally good advice.

While I have run into a few fellow girls who do seem disdainful towards guys who don't try hard enough, I will frankly say I've never seen those particular girls with a guy who looked like he was enjoying a healthy relationship.

From what I know and seen from her, she doesn't seem to be the texting type now that I think about it. I don't really text people that often myself. I tried to look her up on facebook but she really doesn't have one, she told me even if she did have a facebook that she wouldn't really have the time to talk anyway. I'm starting to think that maybe I shouldn't text her anymore, but to straight up call her so I can hear her voice and she can hear mine.
 

Grail

Feel the funk blast
The phone idea is a good one, but you'll still want to wait till she gets back to you via text. I would even recommend asking if you can call after you hear back from her, since shy people don't always like talking on the phone. Anyway, based on all that I've read, it sounds like she's just feeling you out to see if you're not a secret wackadoodle, cause you and your googly eyes have made it pretty clear that you're interested in being friends. :iva:

Anyway, as far as the whole "going out for coffee" cliche goes, don't get caught up in the technicalities. If you don't want coffee, get tea or a sandwich. And if you don't drive, just take the bus or the train. But I'm getting ahead of myself here. For now, just relax and start looking up the names of your future children. :carcus:
 

Aazealh

Administrator
Staff member
Pheonixking3000 said:
Honestly I don't think I can, I'm over analytical by nature and as such I tend to over think a lot of things in general.

Well then try not to show it. It's not cool. That's what "confidence" is about. Don't second-guess everything, just go for it, and shrug it off if it doesn't work.

Pheonixking3000 said:
Wow, so even if a girl gives you her number that still doesn't guarantee that she likes you?

A girl could propose you to come sleep at her place after a night out with friends, and she could still not be interested in you as a sex partner. It all depends on the context (maybe she'd just want for you to avoid a DUI on the long road home while she lives nearby, etc.). Now of course this is an extreme example, but I give it to you so that you get this important point. Obviously if she gave you her number she must have some level of interest, but it could be pretty low, so don't start imagining crazy things or you'll set yourself up for a big disappointment.

Pheonixking3000 said:
Damn, it seems like there is no way to tell if a girl likes you unless they tell you or you over hear them talk about you or something. Well okay, so what your saying is that I shouldn't text her for a while and when I see her again this coming Tuesday that I should ask her to hang out with me? Or would it be a better idea to not do anything until next Friday and I call her?

There are hints obviously, but given your profile I'll say that there's no way to be sure until it's made clear. You see, maybe she likes you, but the same way you like your buddy John. So the one way to be sure is to ask. Very simply, right now you're acquaintances at best. Ask her out and see what she says. If she agrees, well it's quite probable that she's interested. Then you see where it goes from there. If she's not up for it, either she'll be frank with you or she'll dodge the issue so as not to hurt your feelings, but her refusal will be a strong signal that you'd better move on.

Anyway, I'd say don't call her. Wait until you see her next time, and after class when you walk her back to her car, at the end of your talk, casually ask her if she'd like to do something with you at some later time.

Pheonixking3000 said:
So am I projecting my confidence sufficiently or do I come off as being unsure of myself?

If you have to ask people about it on the Internet, you're unfortunately not rating very highly on that particular scale. Just chill out and try to step back a little. This is one girl among many others. One girl you didn't really care much about before your previous interest was discarded. It won't be a big deal if this one fizzles as well.

Pheonixking3000 said:
And also, I don't really like coffee and it seems like everybody takes someone out to coffee for the first time to get to know each other, can it be somewhere else like a fast food place?

It can be pretty much anything, anywhere. It just has to be something she'd enjoy.
 

Antonius Block

We must make an idol of our fear, and call it god.
If what you want is to pursue a relationship with this person, then you have to suck it up and take the step in that direction. Don't beat around the bush, ask her out on a date. I know this is easier said then done, but in the long run there is no other way.

If you get shot down, you mustn't let it you frazzle you, just take note of the experience and use it to your advantage the next time.

My opinion is that in situations like these most people like to have everything laid out for them where it is no effort on their part (guys and girls alike), so if you were to approach her with a plan in mind, and all she has to do is say yes, then chances are you may have a date with this chick in the near future.

Regardless of the outcome you must stay true to yourself. You can sacrifice just about anything but your integrity, so try real hard to be the person you perceive yourself to be.

Best of luck. I've been married for over 5 years now, so I kinda forget about how stressful the dating game can be...

Any chance this girl likes Berserk?
 

Vampire_Hunter_Bob

Cats are great
Aazealh said:
It won't be a big deal if this one fizzles as well.

Aaz is right. The same year I met my current girlfriend (2009), I had gone out with five women and tried pursuing things with a few other women, who gave out mixed signals. When I realized that I could just easily meet another person--through parties, online dating sites, or bars--I stopped assigning so much significance to the people I was dating and would let pursuits, which went nowhere, fizzle out.
 
Grail said:
The phone idea is a good one, but you'll still want to wait till she gets back to you via text. I would even recommend asking if you can call after you hear back from her, since shy people don't always like talking on the phone. Anyway, based on all that I've read, it sounds like she's just feeling you out to see if you're not a secret wackadoodle, cause you and your googly eyes have made it pretty clear that you're interested in being friends. :iva:

Anyway, as far as the whole "going out for coffee" cliche goes, don't get caught up in the technicalities. If you don't want coffee, get tea or a sandwich. And if you don't drive, just take the bus or the train. But I'm getting ahead of myself here. For now, just relax and start looking up the names of your future children. :carcus:

Man your whole entire post had me blushing like crazy! Ughh my impatience is making it really hard for me to wait though.

Aazealh said:
Well then try not to show it. It's not cool. That's what "confidence" is about. Don't second-guess everything, just go for it, and shrug it off if it doesn't work.

I think I'm doing a good job of not showing her that aspect of me so far. But I will try really read to stop second guessing things and not to keep my hopes too high.

Aazealh said:
A girl could propose you to come sleep at her place after a night out with friends, and she could still not be interested in you as a sex partner. It all depends on the context (maybe she'd just want for you to avoid a DUI on the long road home while she lives nearby, etc.). Now of course this is an extreme example, but I give it to you so that you get this important point. Obviously if she gave you her number she must have some level of interest, but it could be pretty low, so don't start imagining crazy things or you'll set yourself up for a big disappointment.

Alright, I will try not to expect so much just from her giving me her number. Would it be a good idea to start expecting the worst so that I won't be so off guard from the disappointment in case things don't turn out well?


Grail said:
There are hints obviously, but given your profile I'll say that there's no way to be sure until it's made clear. You see, maybe she likes you, but the same way you like your buddy John. So the one way to be sure is to ask. Very simply, right now you're acquaintances at best. Ask her out and see what she says. If she agrees, well it's quite probable that she's interested. Then you see where it goes from there. If she's not up for it, either she'll be frank with you or she'll dodge the issue so as not to hurt your feelings, but her refusal will be a strong signal that you'd better move on.

Yeah that's a good idea, I've wasted enough of my time in the past not to linger around with the same girl for so long. When I look back in high school now I realize all the missed opportunities I had with girls who could have really made me happy.


Grail said:
Anyway, I'd say don't call her. Wait until you see her next time, and after class when you walk her back to her car, at the end of your talk, casually ask her if she'd like to do something with you at some later time.

Okay, I am willing to do that, however it will prove difficult do to my impatient attitude.

Grail said:
If you have to ask people about it on the Internet, you're unfortunately not rating very highly on that particular scale. Just chill out and try to step back a little. This is one girl among many others. One girl you didn't really care much about before your previous interest was discarded. It won't be a big deal if this one fizzles as well.

I guess you have a point there, still my confidence has grown considerably since high school and is still growing. Like I said before, this is something I would have never attempted before in the past not even a year ago and the fact I've gotten this far is a testament for me personally, especially considering my introverted tendencies. I really need to work on my conversation starting skills though hehe, I mean I can be pretty good in a conversations in general, but the way I start the conversations are just retarded. But still, so far the conversations have been pretty good, but it can be improved upon. Ugh, with my ineptitude in getting with girls I like, I wonder how my father managed to get so many girlfriends in his younger days, both my parents were very attractive in their days and look young for their ages and I inherited that attractive youthful trait according to many people, so I really don't get why it took me this long to build up my confidence. I guess I am just a late bloomer?

Grail said:
It can be pretty much anything, anywhere. It just has to be something she'd enjoy.

The only thing I know that she likes that we could both do together is to watch an action movie together, like Thor 2. She told me that she really likes action movies, but my older brother told me that going to the movies as a first date type of thing isn't a good idea. He says I'm better off going with her to a place we can sit down and talk. The thing is, I'm not sure taking her to a fast foods restaurant is a good idea, I mean how many people have their first date at Mcdonalds? So when I see her again this Tuesday and walk with her again, I think it might be good for me to ask her what she would like to do, I mean unlike me she actually has a license and can drive places.

Antonius Block said:
If what you want is to pursue a relationship with this person, then you have to suck it up and take the step in that direction. Don't beat around the bush, ask her out on a date. I know this is easier said then done, but in the long run there is no other way.

If you get shot down, you mustn't let it you frazzle you, just take note of the experience and use it to your advantage the next time.

My opinion is that in situations like these most people like to have everything laid out for them where it is no effort on their part (guys and girls alike), so if you were to approach her with a plan in mind, and all she has to do is say yes, then chances are you may have a date with this chick in the near future.

Regardless of the outcome you must stay true to yourself. You can sacrifice just about anything but your integrity, so try real hard to be the person you perceive yourself to be.

Best of luck. I've been married for over 5 years now, so I kinda forget about how stressful the dating game can be...

Any chance this girl likes Berserk?

I am always constantly thinking of ways that I can interact with her as smoothly as possible. What I should say, how I should say it, predict answers she may say, ect so I get that I need to approach her with a prepared mind. I'm thinking when I walk with her to her car on Tuesday that I can be like "Hey, so um.. I feel a bit of a connection with you and I would like to get to know you better, I would love to hang out with you later on if you are cool with it" if she says yes I can ask her where she wants to go and when she could pick me up since I can't really take her anywhere myself currently. But she already knows that I don't have my license so it shouldn't catch her off guard. Also, I've never really brought up the subject of Manga or Anime up to her in general so I'm not entirely sure if she even enjoys reading mangas. Maybe if she says yes to the date I can ask her about it at wherever we hang out at. Also thanks for the good luck.
 
Pheonixking3000 said:
And also, I don't really like coffee and it seems like everybody takes someone out to coffee for the first time to get to know each other, can it be somewhere else like a fast food place?

Aaz and Grail already covered it wonderfully so I'll just be echoing them, but when I said go out for coffee I was just using that as an example of a quiet place where the two of you can relax and talk. You know, there are those people who go on a first date to a concert, club, movie, or the like. While that's fun, it's all but impossible to hear one another much less get to know each other.

Oddly enough, I don't think I've ever actually taken a girl out for coffee so I probably should have used a different example.

Grail said:
cause you and your googly eyes have made it pretty clear that you're interested in being friends. :iva:

Grail said:
For now, just relax and start looking up the names of your future children. :carcus:

Walter said:
He should definitely bring a volume the next time he meets this girl. "Have you read my favorite manga?"

You guys are great. :ganishka:
 

Deci

Avatar by supereva01 @ DA
Well hey if you're like a great many of us and have Berserk tattoos, or in my case a few combined tattoos creating a gigantic one, Berserk is definitely something we probably bring up within the first few minutes of discussing media we enjoy! :slan:

If you're not okay with my huge flying sword logo covering my back then it might not work out.
 

nomad

"Bring the light of day"
You are trying really hard to read between lines when you don't even know this girl very well. Rule #1, the ball will always be on her side of the court. Like most have said, you will know one way or the other if she's into you... But don't hover, whether it's in person or in texts.
 
I just came to the realization that with this current class project and paper we are doing, it might be very difficult for her to find the time to actually hang out with me even if she wanted to. For this final paper most of us will have to go out and study the behavior of certain subcultures and many of us will be volunteering at places as well. Not only that but for our group projects for my group we have to create these blogs that cover Ojibwe cultures. For the next two weeks including this one might be a bit too busy for either of us to hang out, maybe not as much for me but definitely for her since she is actually working and the first time I texted her was after 9:00 pm when she told me she just got off from work. At first I was thinking of asking her to hang out this Tuesday, but maybe I should wait till either Friday at the end of the week over the phone or the 17th, since that is our last day in class. Or maybe I might just stick to asking her this Tuesday, I can't seem to pick which would be the best option for me.
 
Haha sorry but this dug up an old memory I´d forgotten all about. The very first time I was trying to get with a girl. I was low on confidence and had that extreme impatience as well (the texting and all that stuff) and for some reason I ended up playing an emotional role and REALLY trying to get to know her, I guess I thought girls at that young age would find it attractive or something lol. Anyway it backfired in epic proportions cause a few dates later on I found out she´d thought I was gay and just wanted to be close friends :ganishka: And the super awkward way it went down was her telling me about "this guy I met..." Oh god I´d totally repressed all this :iva: The look on both our faces could have been an award winning scene out of a Ben Stiller comedy or something :ganishka: ...BTW Im not implying this would happen to you! Just had to write it down as it came to mind and thought I´d share it.

*clears throat* Sorry about that... Anyway, that impatience could be your downfall, and Im talking about texting inparticular from personal experience. And I think Aaz is right on the money, girls can be hard to read sometimes, things that you´d normally see as a sign of attraction, could very well mean nothing special. But you shouldnt analyze everything like that. Should you spot one of those might-be-signals, just be cool about it and keep moving forward in a smooth fashion and eventually you´ll know for sure what she wants. Yeah thats very abstract, dont really know anymore specific advice than whats already been said.
 
Wow Hanma, she thought you were gay? Damn, that would be incredibly awkward haha!

Yeah, I'm probably not going to text her for a while, I might call her AFTER I actually ask her to hang out with me when she has free time. Still, I'm debating whether I should ask her this Tuesday or on the last day of class.
 
Pheonixking3000 said:
Wow Hanma, she thought you were gay? Damn, that would be incredibly awkward haha!

You cant imagine, man! That was probably the biggest hit my ego´s ever taken, but its fuckin hilarious looking back at it now, and this is actually the first time I´ve told anyone about it. Suffice to say I started a new path after that fated day.

Yeah, I'm probably not going to text her for a while, I might call her AFTER I actually ask her to hang out with me when she has free time. Still, I'm debating whether I should ask her this Tuesday or on the last day of class.

Unless you aint got any choice of course, simply do it when it feels the most natural. Its tough, I know, but a great philosophy Im striving to live by - not only in situations like this but generally when socializing really - is; be cool and just live in the present/moment and dont bother sweating the details or any relationship plans gnawing in your head, focus on her in the now and make the most of each encounter individually. I´ve come to notice that not only the love interests/people you talk to but also you yourself eventually become more comfortable and relaxed like for real even when you deep down actually are very nervous. I know it sounds very romanticized like this, but I was very introverted too before I started doing this - and truth to be told I still am - but as I said this helps me immensely in all kinds of social situations. In my experience you can even "create" an attraction that wasnt even there to begin with like this. Anyway, Im drifting, sorry...
 
Hanma_Baki said:
Unless you aint got any choice of course, simply do it when it feels the most natural. Its tough, I know, but a great philosophy Im striving to live by - not only in situations like this but generally when socializing really - is; be cool and just live in the present/moment and dont bother sweating the details or any relationship plans gnawing in your head, focus on her in the now and make the most of each encounter individually. I´ve come to notice that not only the love interests/people you talk to but also you yourself eventually become more comfortable and relaxed like for real even when you deep down actually are very nervous. I know it sounds very romanticized like this, but I was very introverted too before I started doing this - and truth to be told I still am - but as I said this helps me immensely in all kinds of social situations. In my experience you can even "create" an attraction that wasnt even there to begin with like this. Anyway, Im drifting, sorry...

Honestly, I was feeling more anxious and nervous for like the entire weekend thinking about what I was going to do, but today I don't know why but I feel extremely calm and tomorrow is when I get the chance to see her too. Thanks for you're input on this Hanma, I will be ready for sure when it feels right and well... I feel right :)
 
Pheonixking3000 said:
Honestly, I was feeling more anxious and nervous for like the entire weekend thinking about what I was going to do,

Haha yeah believe me brother, I´ve been what I´d describe as "in love" once, and I totally know what your talking about, its weird as hell. (no not the girl I was talking about, but that storys probably just as funny :iva:)

but today I don't know why but I feel extremely calm

Thats good. You really have to believe in that calmness inside out. Sounds cheesy but its kinda like that thing when you try to laugh for long enough time and then you end up laughing for real.

Thanks for you're input on this Hanma, I will be ready for sure when it feels right and well... I feel right :)

Yeah I can totally sense that, you badass you :badbone: Glad to help. Hope it works out man, I know Im late here so I wont ask in case you dont wanna share.
 
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