The Best Two-Hander

Z

zooty

Gonna try and get this back on topic, As someones whos MADE swords (although badly I prefer armour) unless u do plan to go killing people go for which ever looks better to you. and even then go for the claymore rather than the zweihander or lowlander.

Your other alternatives are either a Ba*tard Sword or get a custom built DS :D. B'tard swords are my personal favorite light enough to be weilded in 1 hand but heavy enough to get that nice bone cracking noise when you strike a limb.

AS for all the rapier vs heavy sword argument... a 2 hander in full swing wouldnt be able to be parried by a fencing foil and a rapier/saber would prolly parry it but the momentum of the blade would make the parry difficult the fencer would probabaly get off a good 2nd jab/slash before the heavy sword came down again taking them out... imo the heavy sword would win against 2 equally skilled fighters. Its a very similar debate to what would win a medievil knight or a samurai... fact is noone is going to ever know.
 
Ramen4ever

Ramen4ever

Majin Tenshi said:
You try swing around 6 pounds balanced a foot out from your hand for 2 minutes and see how easy it is to keep the tip of the blade up.
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Thats another nail you hit on the head.


Here's a quote from wiki. As I'm far too lazy to find a scale and get precise measurements for my blades.
"The modern épée typically has a blade which measures 90 centimetres, and weighs up to 770 grams, although it sometimes weighs as little as 350 grams due to various metals and construction techniques."

770 grams is about 1.69 pounds, it doesn't sound like much but in sword fighting you don't just hold a weapon. You use it, to attack, feint, parry, disengage and beat. This can be really taxing on the hands and wrists. It took me hundreds of hours of practice to get used to fencing epee for hours on end during competitions. Currently I use a rather light weight epee, but the guard still weighs a bit. And most importantly I use a pistol grip[img=http://img337.imageshack.us/img337/4407/pistgripnu1.th.jpg]

rather then a French grip. [img=http://img260.imageshack.us/img260/7531/gripyk2.th.jpg]

With a Pistol grip, it's a lot easier to do strong fast beats against an opponents weapon. While with a French grip you have a slightly longer reach. Generally speaking a person with a pistol grip will usually aim for more blade contact then a person with a French grip. In fact one basic strategy against French grip fencers is to hit their blade.. causing them to lose tip control as well as to tire out their wrists.

With a two handed weapon its no different, if someone smacks the tip of your blade.. your wrists are going to be tired in a matter of seconds. And although its obvious, I'll point it out anyway, that all two handed swords (that I've ever seen) have a straight handle. Which means your wrists and forearms are going to bare all that stress. Sure your shoulders, back and your chest muscles (to some degree) will also get a workout, but generally speaking that will be for swinging left and right, like a drunk lumberjack.

6 pounds is REALLY heavy for actual sword fighting and it would literally take thousands of hours of practice, against targets and opponents to master such a weapon. 1.69 to 6 pounds. :isidro:

Oh and I almost forgot, there are three things that really have to be considered. First it takes a lot of prep time to attack with a two handed weapon. In the time it takes to lift the weapon over your head, there would be a rapier lodged in your eye socket. Second if you do left or right swings, you would also have to take into account how much momentum your blade needs to actually cut something.. rather then just smack it. And third is the balance issue created by swinging such a heavy sword left or right.

Truthfully, a heavy two handed weapon is quite intimidating and cool.. but strategically speaking it's so full of holes that I couldn't possibly explain them all within one post.

As for which sword I'd recommend.. uh post some links or images please. I get practically the same image for both search results.
P.S Thanks for the Sp correction, Aaz. :guts:
 
Aazealh

Aazealh

Administrator
Staff member
Ramen4ever said:
770 grams is about 1.69 pounds, it doesn't sound like much but in sword fighting you don't just hold a weapon. You use it, to attack, feint, parry, disengage and beat. This can be really taxing on the hands and wrists. It took me hundreds of hours of practice to get used to fencing epee for hours on end during competitions. Currently I use a rather light weight epee, but the guard still weighs a bit.
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But that's because you're a wimp with your faggot sword. I can cut through car tires effortlessly with my $300 bastard sword (I hold it with a single hand, always), it's so well-balanced I have to be careful not to cut through my scabbard when I sheathe it. But then again, with my extremely muscular body it's no wonder I have an easier time than the average man.
 
Z

zooty

Aazealh said:
But that's because you're a wimp with your faggot sword. I can cut through car tires effortlessly with my $300 bastard sword (I hold it with a single hand, always), it's so well-balanced I have to be careful not to cut through my scabbard when I sheathe it. But then again, with my extremely muscular body it's no wonder I have an easier time than the average man.
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I laughed so much it hurt
 
Vampire_Hunter_Bob

Vampire_Hunter_Bob

Cats are great
zooty said:
Its a very similar debate to what would win a medievil knight or a samurai... fact is noone is going to ever know.
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Who would win in a fight Slayer with a sword or me with a .50 cal machine gun? Lets say we are on a field and we are both about 100 feet apart, and both are weapons are ready; ie his sword is unsheathed and my machine gun is charged. Who will win? Norse Warrior or me?
 
Ramen4ever

Ramen4ever

Aazealh said:
But that's because you're a wimp with your faggot sword. I can cut through car tires effortlessly with my $300 bastard sword (I hold it with a single hand, always), it's so well-balanced I have to be careful not to cut through my scabbard when I sheathe it. But then again, with my extremely muscular body it's no wonder I have an easier time than the average man.
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Serves me right for posting a serious reply. >_<
 
vlad

vlad

Ramen's post pretty much covers it, all jokes aside!
I'll try and pitch in with a serious comment, I tried wielding a real historical two-hander (the people at the war history museum were quite indulgent), the sword itself looked slender enough, though loooong! Just swinging it around was a pain even without someone parrying (at the time I was 1.83m and 105kg of muscle), so basically I would second Aaz's and Bob's recommendation, get a rifle for long range and a machete ( or something similar) for the dirty work :guts: unless you're looking for a wall-piece that is!
 
S

slayer81

Legendary pimp, slayer of evils
Touche, Douche. For the very few in this whole friggin' thread who actually gave decent answers, I applaud you. And yes, Cold Steel is exactly the place that I was looking at. I'll definitely check out the bastard sword. I've read a little on 'em but haven't focused on that particular blade. I like your description on it though, Zooty, and I must say, that is one thing I look for in an edged weapon, inflicting as much damage as possible, whether it be bone, guts, sinew, and the like. Good points Ramen, I can see your reasoning behind what you say. To all the other "founts of endless wisdom", arguing on the Internet is like the Special Olympics... if even if you win, you're still a retard. We'll take you all out for ice cream afterwards.
Aazealh said:
Sorry, but I don't think anybody here believes that you're an authority on the question. You're neglecting a lot of factors and are basically not basing what you say on anything concrete.
Never claimed to be
Real men, that's who.
Sure, tell it to the guy rolling around on stumps for bringing his "pimp hand" to a knife fight
The Cold War wasn't won by people swinging swords wildly in every direction.
Nope, but I don't see how a couple of countries trying to see who has bigger balls actually classifies as a "war"
Yeah I'm sure you'd be able to sword fight for hours on end without breaking a sweat.
*Insert off-color joke about breaking a sweat on your mother here*
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Jokes aside guys, this is too much of a pain in the ass... fuck it, gimme some IEDs...
 
S

slayer81

Legendary pimp, slayer of evils
Vampire_Hunter_Bob said:
I just reported you to the US military for possibly having WMDS. All joking aside slayer, you know I wouldn't shoot you. Except for hot sex with some chick.
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LMAO, dammit man, that's what the U.S. Military said too! :serpico:

Ramen4ever said:
Although its not directed at you.. I felt this image had to be shared.
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Hahaha, Oh God dude, this threat has lost all semblance of sanity :p
 
Aazealh

Aazealh

Administrator
Staff member
slayer81 said:
Touche, Douche.
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Hmm you know, those two words actually don't rhyme because the actual spelling's "touché". Just figured I'd point it out for future reference.

slayer81 said:
I must say, that is one thing I look for in an edged weapon, inflicting as much damage as possible, whether it be bone, guts, sinew, and the like. [...] To all the other "founts of endless wisdom", arguing on the Internet is like the Special Olympics... if even if you win, you're still a retard. We'll take you all out for ice cream afterwards.
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So, you want your ice cream now or after you disembowel your dog? :casca:

slayer81 said:
Jokes aside guys, this is too much of a pain in the ass... fuck it, gimme some IEDs...
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Good choice, now that's a weapon of our time! :carcus:
 
KazigluBey

KazigluBey

Misanthrōpos
Just buy an 8lb sledge at Home Depot and swing that bad boy around for awhile. You'll have muscles aching that you never knew you had.
 
Scorpio

Scorpio

Courtesy of Grail's doodling.
KazigluBey said:
Just buy an 8lb sledge at Home Depot and swing that bad boy around for awhile. You'll have muscles aching that you never knew you had.
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Actually, last week I used one of those to pound in grounding poles for an electric fence. Each pole was about 6' and after the first pole my arms were dying and I couldn't aim properly. I was basically forced to switch to a smaller hammer (which by that time was also a pain to use). It's surprising the toll those things can take. I guess despite working in building maintenance every day, I'm just not a real man.
 
KazigluBey

KazigluBey

Misanthrōpos
Yeah they will wear you out, regardless of how good of shape your in. Chopping wood will work similarly. Getting an old tractor tire and thumping that with the sledge is a pretty good workout. Strength athletes as well as some MMA competitors use that as part of their training program.
 
X

Xem

Guest
Why only swords? The threads called the best "two-hander" right?

axe_KR22.jpg


or maybe...

mace.jpg
 
KazigluBey

KazigluBey

Misanthrōpos
Speaking of swords, remember the lesson the Romans learned and why they used relatively short swords. Stabbing is much more affective when it comes to killing than hacking or slicing. All you need to do is go several inches with a stab and you are hitting internal organs. You may chop off an arm or leg but that doesn't guarantee a kill.

Not that I'm condoning going around fighting people with swords, but when you look at it from a tactical standpoint take into consideration what the weapon's purpose is.

Also don't bring a sword to a gun fight. :ganishka:
 
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