Movies to dread

Griffith

With the streak of a tear, Like morning dew
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=50_Ala5BKBo

I give them an E for exuberance and bringing back Shane "Jeez, you gotta big pussy!" Black to direct, but The Predator looks like it's going to make Predators look like the original Predator. Also, The Rock does every other action movie that comes out and they couldn't get him or another more Predator-sized dude in this one? Oh well.
 

Walter

Administrator
Staff member
Griffith said:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=50_Ala5BKBo

Also, The Rock does every other action movie that comes out and they couldn't get him or another more Predator-sized dude in this one? Oh well.

His agent would say: "Do you want to live in Arnie's shadow, picking up his scraps, or leave a mark that's all your own...? Now that you're listening to reason, thumb through that Jumanji 2 script before Friday."
 

Griffith

With the streak of a tear, Like morning dew
Walter said:
His agent would say: "Do you want to live in Arnie's shadow, picking up his scraps, or leave a mark that's all your own...? Now that you're listening to reason, thumb through that Jumanji 2 script before Friday."

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aC6eMf87fsc

This has aged surprisingly well. :ganishka:

And that's Jumanji THREE, buddy! Hollywood figured out it's not that people hate rehashes or remakes, they actually just hate letting go and starting over so just provide the thinnest thread of continuity no matter how disparate the stories and productions and you're fine.
 

Aazealh

Administrator
Staff member
Griffith said:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=50_Ala5BKBo

I give them an E for exuberance and bringing back Shane "Jeez, you gotta big pussy!" Black to direct, but The Predator looks like it's going to make Predators look like the original Predator.

I don't know what Hollywood's problem is, but Predator 2 looks like a fucking masterpiece compared to this garbage. I think whoever's in charge fundamentally misunderstands the original movie's appeal.

Griffith said:
Also, The Rock does every other action movie that comes out and they couldn't get him or another more Predator-sized dude in this one? Oh well.

Yeah...
 

NightCrawler

Aeons gone, vast, mad and deathless
Griffith said:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=50_Ala5BKBo

I give them an E for exuberance and bringing back Shane "Jeez, you gotta big pussy!" Black to direct, but The Predator looks like it's going to make Predators look like the original Predator. Also, The Rock does every other action movie that comes out and they couldn't get him or another more Predator-sized dude in this one? Oh well.

The trailers are bad, but Shane Black hasn't made a movie that I disliked, so I'll watch it.
 
NightCrawler said:
The trailers are bad, but Shane Black hasn't made a movie that I disliked, so I'll watch it.

Shane Black is the reason I’ll be seeing this movie as well. I wasn’t a big fan of Iron Man 3, but The Nice Guys made up for it in spades.
 

Vampire_Hunter_Bob

Cats are great
Here's a movie nobody asked for.

Dragged Across Concrete.
Dragged Across Concrete’s premise is as follows: a pair of detectives, Brett Ridgeman (Mel Gibson) and Anthony Lurasetti (Vince Vaughn) are caught on tape applying excessive force to a Hispanic prisoner in handcuffs, in the form of Ridgeman grinding his boot into the man’s neck until it emits a cracking sound. (During the bust, Ridgeman and Lurasetti also mock a scared, naked Latina suspect, claiming they can’t understand what she’s saying due to her accent. Both scenes are played for laughs.) With the tape destined to go viral, Ridgeman and Lurasetti are suspended for six weeks without pay, though the chief of police (Don Johnson) is sympathetic to their plight, delivering a rambling sermon about how being branded a “racist” today is akin to getting labeled a “communist” in the 1950s—or, to quote the president, this is a WITCH HUNT! and these two violent cops are the real victims.
https://www.thedailybeast.com/mel-gibsons-new-police-brutality-movie-is-a-vile-racist-right-wing-fantasy
 

Griffith

With the streak of a tear, Like morning dew
Aazealh said:
I don't know what Hollywood's problem is, but Predator 2 looks like a fucking masterpiece compared to this garbage. I think whoever's in charge fundamentally misunderstands the original movie's appeal.

And that was a BAD movie! I knew that even as a kid, but it's just sensibilities have changed so much even over-the-top bad movies of that time carried themselves with a certain level of gravitas (and an R rating =), whereas today's are more like cartoons. Fast paced, glib and ridiculous, which can make for a more brisk or fun bad experience, but they'll never be good or even mistaken for such. :daiba: :azan: <- Bitter Old Men

NightCrawler said:
The trailers are bad, but Shane Black hasn't made a movie that I disliked, so I'll watch it.
m said:
Shane Black is the reason I’ll be seeing this movie as well. I wasn’t a big fan of Iron Man 3, but The Nice Guys made up for it in spades.

I do not share the optimism that this will somehow work out considering I wasn't a fan of Black's last bit of genre fare, Iron Man 3, either. Plus, rather than trying to right the Predator ship it looks more like they're leaning into making a more self-aware bad Predator movie, because that's just what Predator movies are at this point. I don't know if you can blame them considering the idea has been so tarnished it's hard, and possibly foolish, to try and take it remotely serious anymore. If one wanted to make another earnest Predator movie they'd probably need to start over with a similar concept that isn't carrying so much franchise baggage.

Vampire_Hunter_Bob said:
Here's a movie nobody asked for.

Dragged Across Concrete.https://www.thedailybeast.com/mel-gibsons-new-police-brutality-movie-is-a-vile-racist-right-wing-fantasy

Wow, I kept waiting for the twist to make this some acceptable, if misguided, form of social satire but it never came! Still hard to believe they're actually going to make a vehicle genuinely lamenting that law enforcement may rarely face consequences for abusing minority communities, particularly Latinos. Just in time for movie night at the El Paso kiddie concentration camp!
 

Walter

Administrator
Staff member
Griffith said:
If one wanted to make another earnest Predator movie they'd probably need to start over with a similar concept that isn't carrying so much franchise baggage.

This is exactly what needs to happen. This will not happen. :ganishka:
 

Griffith

With the streak of a tear, Like morning dew
Walter said:
This is exactly what needs to happen. This will not happen. :ganishka:

Yeah, probably not with the Predator proper (unless they totally redesigned it and/or went back to basics =), but technically anybody can make this movie; just an alien ambush horror flick where we don't already know everything about the creature, especially what it looks like. There's surprisingly few Predator derivatives out there (basically Star Hunter) considering how simple and effective a twist it is on the alien monster concept. Maybe it's too specific to riff on without it being a direct copy, and the more feral or primitive you make it the more it just becomes Alien, so yeah, unless this turns out to be some brilliantly irreverent twist on the idea Predator seems doomed to be a one hit wonder that otherwise sort of sucks:

Predator 1987

Predators 2010
Predator 2 1990
Alien vs. Predator 2004
...

AvP2 2007

Man, cracking second place on this sorry list should not be hard. Predators manages it just by being as inoffensively mediocre as possible, and it's still not good (while we're here, it's also worth noting the stupid ultimate predator assassin in the new movie is pretty much the same as the stupid super predators from Predators, so they haven't added anything with this premise). Anyway, if I had to pick one besides the first to drink beers and watch I'd probably still go with Predator 2 out of nostalgia and the so-bad-it's-good factor (1997, the future, where LA is overrun by Jamaican Voodoo gangs and only Roger Murtaugh and his new partner, the Predator, can stop them, plus Bill Paxton and Gary Busey at his worst). Good six pack movie.
thumbup.gif



Speaking of stuff which looks out of time and place and like it absolutely won't work, Venom is finally getting the late 90s, early 2000s comic book movie his fans deserve, complete with vintage effects and an Eminem track where he weirdly hums the chorus so he can rhyme "venom" with "go get 'em" and "momentum" (I'm not kidding, listen to the preview, I've been singing it every chance ever since, the baby loves it =). Tom Hardy is once again just doing whatever with his performance, but here is the one part I actually kind of like because it properly captures the threatening corniness of Venom, lethal protector:

https://youtu.be/xLCn88bfW1o?t=148

So, Venom himself might be fun when he's completely covering up Tom Hardy, but the rest of the movie looks miserable.


UPDATE

What%2BYour%2BLife%2BLooks%2BLike%2BIn%2BThermal%2B6.gif


Somebody said "predator," Shane Black thought they said "sexual predator" and signed up. :carcus:

https://www.usatoday.com/story/life/people/2018/09/09/olivia-munn-shunned-predator-cast-after-flagging-sex-offender/1248252002/

The Predator has been #MeToo'd; turns out it had a vision setting all along that allowed him just to see through clothes and locker room walls! I'd say this is an unfortunate marring of the project beyond the obvious negative implications for all involved, especially Munn working with the guy unbeknownst to her, but like I said, this didn't look like a winner anyway (the best part of the trailer was the use of "One Shot, One Kill" and Snoop Dogg's "living legend" verse to introduce the Predator). Although the reviews are calling it yet another successful requel nostalgia trip like the new Halloween, but Predators basically already was that (save for lack of Arnold, and again the Rock would have said yes then too).

BTW, before this even happened, I took Olivia Munn's presence into consideration when deciding this movie couldn't be good because I couldn't recall her ever being in anything good. But it goes much deeper...

https://www.reddit.com/r/movies/comments/8dak0d/conspiracy_theory_olivia_munn_is_brought_in_to/ said:
X-men First-class: Awesome with a ~90% RT score. X-men Days of Future Past: Awesome with a ~90% RT score. Then Olivia Munn joins for Apocalypse. Awful movie with a 45% RT score.

Lego Movie. Awesome. Lego Batman. Awesome. Then Munn joins for the Ninjago movie. Uh huh.

Still don't believe me? Was Olivia Munn in Zoolander? No. Was Olivia Munn in Zoolander 2? Yes.

Her IMDB page is basically one long list of movies that ruined franchises. She is in the new predator movie and Ocean's 8, so RIP to those franchises I guess.
Aaron Rodgers: super bowl mvp 2011, Olivia Munn enters his life: 0 super bowl games, broken clavicle, concussions, those terrible commercials...
IIRC, she also dated Brad Richards when he was on the NY Rangers. During that time, he was a much worse player.
He got his coubtract bought out. Presumably broke up. Signed a one year contract with the Blackhawks and got to center Patrick Kane and win a Stanley Cup.

Shit she really is the problem.

Yikes. Well, at least the ruination is a righteous act this time... they shouldn't have fucked around with another Predator.
 
Whatever compelled Munn to get into acting in the first place; or perhaps a better question would be, what compelled producers to think she could act? I recall she was on that old gaming program "Attack of the Show", but, what else?
 

Griffith

With the streak of a tear, Like morning dew
Zeke said:
Whatever compelled Munn to get into acting in the first place; or perhaps a better question would be, what compelled producers to think she could act? I recall she was on that old gaming program "Attack of the Show", but, what else?

IDK, what compels anybody to get into acting or entertainment or for people to cast them (some combination of talent, fit, and photogenics of course)? We kind of pigeonhole people based on what we know them for but she might have been settling hosting that show until she could get some acting work, or she just got unexpected opportunities, based on it. Anyway, as discussed she seems to be an unwitting harbinger of movie malpractice, but looked alright in this for what it is, so she must be pretty pissed to torch it and the cast, which seems a bit unfair unless they're really mistreating her privately (of course, I wouldn't want to talk to someone publicly dragging me and my movie for something I might have had nothing to do with either, and based on her luck I wouldn't want to associate with her anyway =).


UPDATE: Looks like we're switching gears to some better bad press, "Hey, did you hear Arnold turned down a part in the movie!?"

https://www.cbr.com/the-predator-reason-arnold-schwarzenegger-turned-down-cameo/ said:
“Understandably – and believe me, I completely get it – he said, ‘Look, that’s kind of a small part, and I don’t really think I want to do that. I’m off to do Terminator with Jim Cameron, basically. Or for Jim Cameron’,” Black told Digital Spy. “So I totally got it, you know? If I was Schwarzenegger, I’d want to be one of the stars of a film, or nothing.”

But... you wrote the movie, Shane, so if you knew that why not offer him a bigger part, like as an expert at the Predator lab or something? He'd have a lot in common with the Holbrook character and could play sage to the new group hunting the Predator, as has become common in these projects (it's called a formula, like bringing in the bigger, badder Predator =). Did you really need more Sterling K. Brown punchlines or *gulp* Olivia Munn? Maybe he originally offered Arnold the part of the sex offender; it all could have gone so differently! :ganishka:
 
Speaking of Venom, the first teaser or trailer looked like garbage. Even as a massive fan of Tom, I'd have to force myself to step into the theater or pay for it. The last trailer that got shoved in my face at the movies (I try to avoid em as much as I can but movie previews these days ... suck, sigh) looked decent and you get to see the same bad CGI but more Venom, so there's a bit of hope. I also don't know anything of the comics, so if the story doesn't deliver in that regard, I won't know/ it won't bother me as much as die hard fans. Funnily enough, his doppelganger Logan Marshall-Green's new movie sees the actor playing the same role (!!!) in the sense, they're both infused with something they have to battle with physically and mentally.

Upgrade is a SOLID sci fi action flick, so much fun man - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1hTLGlgZ4Z8

Griffith said:
Maybe he originally offered Arnold the part of the sex offender; it all could have gone so differently! :ganishka:

Hahaha!!! Where do you come up with these thoughts man?! Brilliant.

I feel like Arnold coming back would surely add to my personal excitement to watch it. Nobody around me is talking about it or wants to see it. Time permitting, I just might by myself this weekend ...
 

Griffith

With the streak of a tear, Like morning dew
IncantatioN said:
Speaking of Venom, the first teaser or trailer looked like garbage. Even as a massive fan of Tom, I'd have to force myself to step into the theater or pay for it. The last trailer that got shoved in my face at the movies (I try to avoid em as much as I can but movie previews these days ... suck, sigh) looked decent and you get to see the same bad CGI but more Venom, so there's a bit of hope. I also don't know anything of the comics, so if the story doesn't deliver in that regard, I won't know/ it won't bother me as much as die hard fans.

Yeah, it looked and frankly still looks pretty bad, like a generically bad superfero flick from 15 years ago. As for fans, Venom is kind of controversial and there's lots of people that feel he's trash, so I don't think too many will be passionate about this either way, especially divorced from Spider-Man and the original symbiote suit story. It's a weird project, like they're only doing this because it's the biggest Spider-Man adjacent character they own (besides, uh... SPIDER-MAN!), but not big enough anybody will make much of a stink if/when they fuck it up like Spider-Man. I don't understand what Sony's doing with the property or really this whole crossover Spider-Man deal. It seems to make sense for nobody but fans that want to see Spidey in the MCU, so I'm not complaining but it's still strange. Does Sony get the standalone movie profits and Marvel gets the prestige and boost of having Spidey in their team-up universe? It either doesn't seem worth the effort for Marvel or the cost for Sony no matter how you slice it because you're slicing the profits up in any case. It'd be interesting to see an exact breakdown of who pays what, does what, and gets what out of it (Ok, Sony handles all the money in or out, Marvel the creativity and branding benefits). I guess Sony gets to avoid too much work and looking like WB/DC while hitching their wagon to the successful Marvel machine. It only makes sense if they were basically ready to give up on it anyway, which I guess they were.

IncantatioN said:
Funnily enough, his doppelganger Logan Marshall-Green's new movie sees the actor playing the same role (!!!) in the sense, they're both infused with something they have to battle with physically and mentally.

Upgrade is a SOLID sci fi action flick, so much fun man - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1hTLGlgZ4Z8

Green should try to fill the void of roles calling for a charismatic Hardy, the version from Inception everyone thought would be the next James Bond, and not some weirdo. What is Hardy doing in Venom? I think the Venom special effects seem more real than Hardy's Eddie Brock effects, like, even when he just tells the lady he has a parasite, WHAT IS HE DOING!? He actually sounds more normal as Venom, hmmm... now I'm coming back around on it. Damn you, Hardy! =)

IncantatioN said:
Hahaha!!! Where do you come up with these thoughts man?! Brilliant.

I take two tangentially related things, twist them together in unexpected ways, and hope comedy ensues, usually with mixed results. See above.

IncantatioN said:
I feel like Arnold coming back would surely add to my personal excitement to watch it. Nobody around me is talking about it or wants to see it. Time permitting, I just might by myself this weekend ...

It really doesn't look like anything special that would otherwise pull people in, just another mediocre Predator movie, and the creepy Shane Black "sex offender buddy" story (which Munn seems more interested in publicizing than the movie! :ganishka:) puts a stake in its already tepidly beating heart. It may very well be the best one since the original (it's reviews not so coincidentally went in the tank this week), but however it could accomplish that feat doesn't come across in the trailers where it might as well be AvP: Requiem 2.
 
I gotta say, Venom is fulfilling the role that's had a void for some time: a big budget film that's so bad, it's good. Nowadays, you either have a movie that goes bugnuts like that, but has no budget, or a big budget movie that's just bland. Venom is clearly meant to be a blockbuster, but is so full of cheesy, over the top acting, that it's just gonna be a fun trip. I hope to see it opening night.
 

Walter

Administrator
Staff member
Griffith said:
UPDATE: Looks like we're switching gears to some better bad press, "Hey, did you hear Arnold turned down a part in the movie!?"

But... you wrote the movie, Shane, so if you knew that why not offer him a bigger part, like as an expert at the Predator lab or something? He'd have a lot in common with the Holbrook character and could play sage to the new group hunting the Predator, as has become common in these projects (it's called a formula, like bringing in the bigger, badder Predator =). Did you really need more Sterling K. Brown punchlines or *gulp* Olivia Munn? Maybe he originally offered Arnold the part of the sex offender; it all could have gone so differently! :ganishka:

So weird! This is exactly what I said when I was trying to make a B-movie in today's market. In reality, my producer spit in my face after I relayed Arnold's asking price to be involved in my terrible movie.
 

Griffith

With the streak of a tear, Like morning dew
NCHaskew said:
I gotta say, Venom is fulfilling the role that's had a void for some time: a big budget film that's so bad, it's good. Nowadays, you either have a movie that goes bugnuts like that, but has no budget, or a big budget movie that's just bland. Venom is clearly meant to be a blockbuster, but is so full of cheesy, over the top acting, that it's just gonna be a fun trip. I hope to see it opening night.

I liked this take... until it was confirmed Venom will be PG-13! This pushes it closer to "plain bad" territory without some ridiculous and/or gory kills, IMO. The reasoning may be worse. Rather than just saying it's "to recoup more opening weekend money before it bombs," it's supposedly so they can potentially crossover with Spider-Man down the line, which, while I appreciate the long game, do you really think Marvel is going to want anything to do with this mess? I mean, Feige reportedly already hates the Marvel TV and Netflix stuff, do you really think he's going to want to legitimize this third party minor league shit? Ironically, Deadpool might be the most likely to be continued by Marvel because of how well done and received it's been, as it's virtually already an R rated MCU franchise, and I think they may have even expressed interest in doing something like that, an R rated superhero movie, themselves.

The more interesting part of this ambition to me is that after Avengers 4 and Spider-Man 2 they need to renegotiate Spidey's deal... will Sony use its leverage to demand the inclusion of Venom in the MCU or Holland's Spider-Man in a Venom movie? If Sony is adamant and Marvel balks, can Sony technically hire Holland and just continue the current Spidey brand themselves, meaning they'll essentially be rogue MCU offshoot sequels!? This could get DCCU messy, but I wouldn't be surprised if the original deal forbids all this shit and everything Marvel has done with the property can't be touched by Sony, but then I wouldn't be shocked if it wasn't. We could also be looking at a 4th Spidey reboot in a few years.
 

Griffith

With the streak of a tear, Like morning dew
As expected, The Predator is more like the prey:

https://www.boxofficemojo.com/news/?id=4438&p=.htm said:
With an estimated $24 million, 20th Century Fox's The Predator took the weekend's #1 spot, but the film has little to celebrate. Debuting in 4,037 theaters, the film's opening is the worst for a live-action film opening in over 4,000 locations, unseating The Mummy, which previously held the distinction after its $31.6 million opening in 4,035 theaters last summer. The opening currently falls short of even 2010's Predators which opened with $24.76 million in just 2,669 locations. That film went on to gross just over $52 million.

Ouch, on the bright side it made more than that overseas and may break even on paper (with a relatively paltry $88 mil budget), but with the marketing costs and all those screens they clearly had bigger ideas. Hopefully this means we won't be having to endure any more half-assed Predator movies pretending this is some blockbuster tentpole franchise when it was actually a singularly good 80's action movie (with the biggest action star and arguably the best action director of the era on board!).

Speaking of which, and the sad history of the Predator "franchise" beyond the original, that also translates to its relatively tiny box office:

https://www.boxofficemojo.com/showdowns/chart/?id=predators.htm

The only one of these that seems worth it is the first one, so just stop trying to make the Predator a thing already! Let someone do it right on a smaller scale down the road, no more obvious franchise aspirations, or knock it off altogether.
 

Aazealh

Administrator
Staff member
Griffith said:
Hopefully this means we won't be having to endure any more half-assed Predator movies pretending this is some blockbuster tentpole franchise when it was actually a singularly good 80's action movie (with the biggest action star and arguably the best action director of the era on board!).

Yeah... Let's hope they stop sullying that name now.
Also, needless to say but Shane Black really screwed the pooch on that one.
 

Griffith

With the streak of a tear, Like morning dew
Dark PhoeniX

Appears to have no plot, and certainly none resembling the comic (why redo it poorly yet again?), besides blandly ruminating on the title character like the last one (these movies are the two hour film embodiment of knowingly saying the title of the movie within the movie). McAvoy is now playing Xavier as boring as Professor X was always meant to be, Fassbender has gone from slumming it to being culpable in the badness, Jennifer Lawrence went from wanting out of this franchise to sort of needing it, and I'm so bored I hardly care. Next.


I'd rather see Shyamalan's Glass.

But dread it nonetheless because it's been so long, the director's track record is still what it is, and despite the hard won comeback story that's usually about the time the floor falls out from under you again. =)
 

Griffith

With the streak of a tear, Like morning dew
A double-post of a movie if there ever was one:

Sonic the Hedgehog

Those box office records may be short-lived, Endgame, as the era of comic book movie dominance comes to a close, the age of video game films is ascendant!

I want everyone even mildly unappreciative of the MCU machine to watch this trailer. Really take a look, breath it in, because THIS was MY childhood comic/game/cartoon movie adaptation experience (it even has Jim Carrey =). I'm home again, and while I was gone Sonic has pulled out the trash from under the sink and shit all over the place, as it should be.
 
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Walter

Administrator
Staff member
A double-post of a movie if there ever was one:

Sonic the Hedgehog

Those box office records may be short-lived, Endgame, as the era of comic book movie dominance comes to a close, the age of video game films is ascendant!

I want everyone even mildly unappreciative of the MCU machine to watch this trailer. Really take a look, breath it in, because THIS was MY childhood comic/game/cartoon movie adaptation experience (it even has Jim Carrey =). I'm home again, and while I was gone Sonic has pulled out the trash from under the sink and shit all over the place, as it should be.

Sigh.... I'm going to have to take my kid to see this garbage. He already knows it exists, and he cannot wait. :daiba:
emoji-pistol.png
 

There's more to complain about than this, but the way they had the background music clip in and out with every Jim Carrey line in the sort of late middle of the trailer really annoyed me, and I don't know why they did that. As far as the movie goes, I feel like Jim Carrey as Robotnik is kind of a good choice, but it doesn't look like they're gonna go for the full ridiculous cartoon thing of like the Wachowskis' Speed Racer (sue me, I loved it) and instead for just making a grating cartoon character deliver MCU lines (lmao fitbit!).
 
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