I'm feeling annoying and pretentious so I decided to write a little story because I got nothing better to do with my life! And what better thread to post in than here.
Charles the snail: A story of power, sacrifice and corruption.
After realising half his life was over, Charles the violent snail suffered a terrible midlife crisis. Needed to expand his horizon to seek a final cause suited to his withered sanity. though the answer was already seeded inside like a fleshy jar of inky sponge by picking up young sooty orphans in his emerald heart valve and presenting the button eyed children with soggy bread.
Yes, to truly serve out this desperate conquest over sleepy infants he would have to expand his ideology towards universal domination. This meant he would take on such powerful beings of the three Galaxies and two Bedrooms.... The Powerdoise seven. A formal challenge with the ruthless group of misfit monkeys who would digest any creature slimy or otherwise who dared to step in reach of their incredibly long platinum toe nails!
Charles was uncertain of his fate but feeling a very brave slimy creature was he, so brave was he that he came only armed with a heart rate monitor. There was more to this training device than ones suspected however, not only was it capable of keeping track of Charles little slimy heart but if used correctly harnessed the power to annihilate anyone who opposed the wearer with condensed energy comparable to that of the aftermath of a supernova.... but was Charles ready to control such power while face to face with his uncertain destiny as god of the 7 golden rings?
The agreed battle grounds was a small Fig tree on the forth planet of waistona after a formal written challenge to the powerdoise brothers. The battle was indeed fierce and an outstanding, far exceeding that of any gastropod lifeform before him. It felt like the young doughy tissue of the crimson guitar from above as he thwarted any special attack related or unrelated to platinum those crazy bloodthirsty monkeys threw at him and for a long while every attempt was in vain.
Flying through the branches, knocking figs and leaves off the trees left right and centre until everything but the bare tree was blown into space. Unfortunately one of the Powerdoise monkeys finally realised Charles's weakspot as a snail no matter what godlike powers he possessed, and threw a clump of salt at the moist water based creature.
Dispair was inevitable and Charles could no longer win, but had one little trick to draw the fight. Realising the consequences of such a weapon would ultimately destroy him as well as the enemy, the exhausted and stubborn snail no longer cared for he was ready to die at any moment. The unfathomable power of the heart rate monitor eradicated the snail, the powerdoise seven and every root of the fig tree, but the gastropods legacy will continue on. Fight on in spirit little snail, giving hope to any worthless creatures with a insane lust for power, show us the way.
Awesome, Im not only witty and clever but also weird and unique as well. Raise my post, love me, hate me but above all shower me with attention! Well... time to go preach in another fan based forum I joined with no real interest in I guess, see you all in a few months ;)
PS: Berserk.... What the fuck's that!?
Charles the snail: A story of power, sacrifice and corruption.
After realising half his life was over, Charles the violent snail suffered a terrible midlife crisis. Needed to expand his horizon to seek a final cause suited to his withered sanity. though the answer was already seeded inside like a fleshy jar of inky sponge by picking up young sooty orphans in his emerald heart valve and presenting the button eyed children with soggy bread.
Yes, to truly serve out this desperate conquest over sleepy infants he would have to expand his ideology towards universal domination. This meant he would take on such powerful beings of the three Galaxies and two Bedrooms.... The Powerdoise seven. A formal challenge with the ruthless group of misfit monkeys who would digest any creature slimy or otherwise who dared to step in reach of their incredibly long platinum toe nails!
Charles was uncertain of his fate but feeling a very brave slimy creature was he, so brave was he that he came only armed with a heart rate monitor. There was more to this training device than ones suspected however, not only was it capable of keeping track of Charles little slimy heart but if used correctly harnessed the power to annihilate anyone who opposed the wearer with condensed energy comparable to that of the aftermath of a supernova.... but was Charles ready to control such power while face to face with his uncertain destiny as god of the 7 golden rings?
The agreed battle grounds was a small Fig tree on the forth planet of waistona after a formal written challenge to the powerdoise brothers. The battle was indeed fierce and an outstanding, far exceeding that of any gastropod lifeform before him. It felt like the young doughy tissue of the crimson guitar from above as he thwarted any special attack related or unrelated to platinum those crazy bloodthirsty monkeys threw at him and for a long while every attempt was in vain.
Flying through the branches, knocking figs and leaves off the trees left right and centre until everything but the bare tree was blown into space. Unfortunately one of the Powerdoise monkeys finally realised Charles's weakspot as a snail no matter what godlike powers he possessed, and threw a clump of salt at the moist water based creature.
Dispair was inevitable and Charles could no longer win, but had one little trick to draw the fight. Realising the consequences of such a weapon would ultimately destroy him as well as the enemy, the exhausted and stubborn snail no longer cared for he was ready to die at any moment. The unfathomable power of the heart rate monitor eradicated the snail, the powerdoise seven and every root of the fig tree, but the gastropods legacy will continue on. Fight on in spirit little snail, giving hope to any worthless creatures with a insane lust for power, show us the way.
Awesome, Im not only witty and clever but also weird and unique as well. Raise my post, love me, hate me but above all shower me with attention! Well... time to go preach in another fan based forum I joined with no real interest in I guess, see you all in a few months ;)
PS: Berserk.... What the fuck's that!?